"A man is himself, plus the books he reads."

"He who laughs last thinks slowest."

"There is no such thing as a stupid question; just stupid people."

"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits."

"Burn the candle at both ends and you double the chance of getting your fingers burned."

"There is nothing like sealing a letter to inspire a fresh thought."

"Disneyland is the greatest people trap ever built by a mouse."

"There is nothing wrong in having nothing to say -- unless you insist on saying it."

"There are some who, in a 50-50 proposition, insist on getting the hyphen too."

"Chose a job you love and you'll never have to work a day in your life."

"Let us be thankful for fools; but for them the rest of us could not succeed."

"The chicken probably came before the egg because it's hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg."

"Living with a saint is more grueling than being one."

"If you can't convince them -- confuse them."

"Flattery is the art of telling another person exactly what he thinks of himself."

"Having your book turned into a movie is like seeing your oxen being turned into bullion cubes."

"My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my life there."

"Agree or disagree with the following statement: There are two kinds of people in this world -- Those that seperate people into two groups and those that don't."

"The best book on programming for the layman is "Alice in Wonderland"; but that's because it's the best book on anything for the layman."

"Conceit is an odd disease; it makes everyone sick but the one who has it."

"An honest politian is one who when he is bought will stay bought."

"A class reunion is when everyone gets together to see who is falling apart."

"A successful executive in business is one who can delegate all the responsiblity, shift all the blame, and appropriate the credit."